On doors closing: A story about pivoting from Teacher to Artist

"Blush Sea", 8x10 print.

"Blush Sea", 8x10 print.

My closest friends and family know that almost 4 years ago, I was COMPLETELY lost. 

Now, don't get me wrong, I absolutely loved teaching and I loved making art in the evenings and on weekends, but I was at a major crossroads.  I actually have a unique curse of loving almost everything, so while I look like I am always happy and smiling, it's just because I am unusually good at "turning lemons into lemonade", as they say.  

Our family was relocating to NYC and I was feeling major pressure to find a new job teaching high school Art and/or Spanish.  But, the issue was that nothing felt right.  I interviewed, I traveled to NYC looking for jobs, I visited schools, I interviewed again, I prepared countless applications on my couch at night and then went to work again in to teach "my kids" at school the next morning, but nothing was sticking. I felt hopeless.  

Maybe my heart wasn't really in it. 

Maybe the universe was shouting in my face "DO IT, MEGAN, TAKE THE LEAP!", but it just didn't feel like it at the time. 

At the time, it felt like panic.  I felt like doors were closing and my career was changing and it was SCARY.  I hate to disappoint people.  It felt like I had studied so hard to become a teacher, I had learned so much in my almost 10 years at my first career, I had fought really hard to achieve the roles in the schools I had worked at and I was willing to throw it all away for a dream. 

I felt careless.  

So, this post is an encouragement to anyone out there who is in that weird middle phase of deciding what to do next.  To anyone who thinks that they are outgrowing something and need to take a giant leap of faith but is scared shitless to do it.  For anyone who wishes that they had the guts to make a change in their life, but isn't sure if the sacrifice is worth it. 

It will happen when it's time and you won't feel ready.  But it will be wonderful, I promise. 

On a podcast that I LOVE called "Second Life" with Hillary Kerr of My Domaine, I recently heard Jen Gotch (founder of Ban.do) speak about how she just always kept following the one thing that made sense and that she was not sure if it would work out.  I guess that's what happened and why Art by Megan exists as it does today. 

I couldn't stop painting.  I couldn't put it aside.  I couldn't stop dreaming of it happening "someday".  

So, cheers to the dreamers out there.  Just keep dreaming and fighting and letting the crazy universe steer you towards what you love.  It will be painful and difficult and beautiful and wild.  Hold on tight. 

"Gray Sea" 8x10 print.  

"Gray Sea" 8x10 print.  

xoxo, 

M